Monday, February 18, 2008

So...That's It?


I have no idea who this girl is...but I couldn't resist posting the picture.
So...as many of you know, I just returned from Disney World in Florida. First and foremost, I actually got out of the airport, made it to my hotel and several LONG days later, made it back to my place in California. Woo Hoo for me!
So this was my first forray into the realm of the Magic Kingdom.The very first thing that I noticed was how BIG this place really is. For anyone who hasn't been to Disney World, it actually consists of 12 parks and recreation areas each designed to grapple every last dollar from your wallet, a myriad of hotels paying obescience to the world of Walt, and a collection of "necessities", (such as gas stations and food establishments), all of which will extrapolate whatever remaining savings you may have hidden away into some 401K or ROTH IRA that even the IRS didn't know about.Basically it is a money-sucking fiefdom that bows down to the feudal lord of Mice.Now to be fair...I did have a good time. On Thursday night, when most people in this country were wooing their loved ones with whisperings of sweet nothings, I and several thousand other people, were enjoying ourselves at the Animal Kingdom. It was a night full of wonder and awe, and two white people "dancing" (I use the term loosely) with nary a care in the world in a sea of black people who actually could dance. You see these new movies coming out about street dance competitions?Well, this was the Family Feature Films version.Ashley (one of my long-time friends from the Russian team) and I were out there just having a ball, and all it took was some music, a DJ, a whole swarm of people who knew what they were doing, and the company to rent out an entire theme park for the night. Who says you can't have fun at other people's expense?
Oh we did get to go on two rides that night, the "It's Hard To Be A Bug" experience in the "Tree of Life".
(This thing was HUGE)
It was a pretty cool 3-D movie that was VERY interactive.We also got to ride on the Conquer Everest roller coaster a couple of times.On Friday we really didn't have much time to do anything fun...we worked...all...day...long.
However...in a self-serving shout out to myself, (after all, this is my blog), I was invited to help do one of the presentations at the convention. This is an opportunity usually reserved for people in positions of a much higher tax bracket than me, so it was a great chance for me to get my name out there into the upper echelon of company management.On Saturday, we were back to the whole work thing...however, an hour or so into it, I got a call from my boss that went something like this:
Boss: Zach! I have good news and bad news...which do you want?

Me: Bad News.

Boss: You have to go back to your hotel and get your suit.

Me: Why is that bad news?

Boss: Because several people saw your presentation yesterday and they want you to give it again today.
So I got to give the presentation again. I was very happy about that.
Saturday night we were able to go to Disney's Hollywood Studios. After a long meeting of recognition of many of our top leaders, we then had the whole park to ourselves. This meant that we could walk up to any food vendor and ask for whatever we wanted...and they gave it to us.We were also able to go on the Aerosmith Rock'n'Roll Rollercoaster
(This thing was WICKED fast)

And we also went to the Hollywood Tower of Terror
(This was AWESOME)

Sadly those were the only two rides we got in that night. After getting food and such, they herded us like cattle into the Fantas-imagination-Doo-Hickey Show, (that's the official name...really! Ok...it's actually called "Fantasmic").Of all the live productions that I have ever seen...this one shot straight to the top. And I have seen "Wicked".After the show we all went back to the various hotels where we were staying. I was in the Caribbean Beach, and no matter where I looked, I never did get to see Jack Sparrow.Several of us ended up sitting down on the man-made beach just looking out over the water of the private lagoon there. We all had to catch the buses at 3 and 4 in the morning, so we weren't in any real hurry to get a good night's sleep. What was the point? It was already 1 AM. We did all end up getting about an hour of sleep before heading to the airport. This is where MY adventure began.I won't bore you with the harrowing details, (because you have already endured enough), but I will give you the Reader's Digest version:

I ended up at the Orlando airport 2 hours before my flight...my first layover was in Ft. Lauderdale...ahh...the memories...I ended up sitting there for 4 hours before my next flight to Atlanta Georgia. I wasn't supposed to be in that airport for very long, however, a swarm of tornados decided it was time to surround the city, so all flights were grounded until it was safe to fly again. That was almost 8 hours later. THEN we had to worry about the curfew of the OC airport. If a plane is coming in after 11:30 PM, it has to re-route to LAX because of city noise ordinances. By this time we had a 7 minute window in which to land. We were told by the Famous Airport Voice that we had been "authorized" to take a quicker route from Atlanta to Orange County. I am scratching my head head trying to figure out what faster route. Where they going to buzz some bison in Montana on the way over?Anyway...with our new "faster" route, we made it on time...my luggage was there...and I was able to get home and into bed by 12:30 AM. All to get up this morning, come in and open the office.

I have never had a hang over...but I think I know what it feels like now.
In summary...Disney World...Disneyland...Amusement Parks in general:

Did I have a grand ol' time?

Yes.

Did I stop and pause every time I saw a price for admission, or a $50 shirt, and think, "How on Earth do people afford to bring entire families here???"

Yes.

Will I ever go again?

Only if I suddenly find myself with a whole stink load of money and absolutely nothing else in the world to spend it on. Or I get married and my wife and kids bat their tender eyes at me and say "Please".

I better start saving.

12 comments:

Mandy said...

You put Fantasmic over Wicked, are you kidding me??? The company alone was way better than Mickey Mouse!

The Lund Five said...

I am glad you had a fun time in Florida and that you made it out of the airport this time. Since I have seen neither Fantasmic or Wicked I can't give my opinion on what I think is better. However, I really do want to see Wicked. I have read the book.

rsheedy said...

Yay! I'm glad you finally went to a Disney park! :) That sucks about your flight home, though. Ugh.

The Wright's said...

Loved the report. Sounds magical, exciting and mous-erific! I think the coolest part is getting pretty-well-whatever you wanted from those vendors. Did you go for the hunk-o-meat? (HUGE turkey leg? I never could eat those, I felt a little barbaric.) Sounded like fun. If only you saw Jack...that would have completed the vacation! :-)

Yelyah's Corner said...

Zach
I contemplated not leaving a comment, because of my recent jealousy rage of your blogularity!
But I guess I will add to the flame of comments, and state that you live a pretty sweet life (no wonder people read your blog)! Congratulations on your presentation!

Smiley Family said...

Congrats on your successful trip - except for the flight home. I am so glad that you enjoyed your time at Disney World. You are lucky to have gone for free! You probably would not have had as much fun if you had to pay for it yourself. Congrats also on your successful presentation.

whitney said...

"...we could walk up to any food vendor and ask for whatever we wanted...and they gave it to us."

The sad thing is, out of your entire post, the thing I was most jealous of was that little tidbit there. How absolutely fabulous would it be to have full rein over the food vendors. *sigh* Maybe one day I'll be as cool as you, Zach. Probably not.

Craig Lifferth said...

"Grapple every last dollar from your wallet!" Oh its so true! The churros cost like 14 bucks I swear and they aren't that good. But I'm glad to see that you enjoyed your stay with Brother Disney.

All About M.E.('s) said...

Wow-congrats on the invite to give your presentation TWICE-that is awesome. I'm glad you had a chance to experience Disneyworld-sounds like you had a grand time!

Nathan and Esther said...

I love your pictures in that post, especially the one of the polar bear. So funny! Anyway I'm glad you had a great time, kudos on your double presentation (maybe you'll make that upper tax cut yet!) And yes, maybe I too will be as cool as you one day. (but probably not!)

The Carter Family: said...

Your trip sounded awesome (well, except for the airport delays! Just having free reign over the food vendors would have been awesome, let alone all the other stuff you were able to do! Maybe someday we all could experience a trip like that!

Kimie said...

What if it's me and my kids batting our eyes at you in the next couple years and Kyle and I finally take the kids to Disneyland? (We'll need someone to watch the kids while Kyle and I do all the fun rollercoasters they are too little for ;).)