Supernumerary Vagabonds

I'm not sure what it is, but lately, the number of bindle-boasting transients seems to have multiplied itself in this little production I call My Life. In the last two weeks there have been three separate occasions where gutterpups have played a central role.
It seems that just a short time ago, (and when I say short, I mean lacking the distance of a fortnight), a domicile-impaired individual thought it might be a good idea to become bunk mates with the Lord. No one is 100% sure how long he was able to pull this off, but it was recently found that a gentleman had moved himself into our church building and had been living there for some time. I suppose with its vast array of space and potential hiding places, it made for a perfect shanty, however, he was discovered and quickly evicted from his rent-free abode. Curious...this same building is where we have seminary each weekday morning...but more on that later.

My next adventure with vagrancy occurred last week when I flew up to Oakland for work. My journey to the Land of Raiders was aboard none other than the Southwest Airlines. Being famous for their "Cattle Calling" technique of sitting people, it is always a lottery draw to see who your co-lucky bench jockey is going to be. This trip I landed the Granola Award with Personal Hygiene Issues thrown in for that little bit of...what's that phrase again? Oh yeah...gag reflex. My quatragenarian traveling companion gave the distinct impression that he had not battled with a bar of soap since the turn of the Century. Aside from the odor though, it was his perpetual snow storm that had my skin crawling. You see...he was blessed with a full and thick head of long, albeit greasy, hair that he allowed to flow freely down and across his shoulders. However, each time he shook his locks, a small cloud of dandruff wafted through the air. He wasn't shy about shaking those ivory-flake infested tresses.
What was particularly entertaining was that on the other side of him sat an attractive young woman that was just too nice not to ignore him. He engaged her in conversation and although she was polite enough to respond just enough not to shoot him down directly, her body languages screamed, "If I had a tazer, it would be charging right now."

Finally, this morning we had another drifter drama at the church. During Seminary, it seems that an odd man carrying a lunch box, 4 grocery bags of sheet music, and a cell phone with charger, entered into the chapel, sat himself down at the piano and began plinking away at the keys. After class was over, I was one of the last to leave, I came into the lobby where my bishop, (great man by the way), and two mothers with wringing hands were standing around not really knowing what to do. They filled me in on as to our visitor, and the Bishop had finally gotten through on a phone call he had been trying to make. The man said that he was part of a musical group that will be performing during the Holidays and that he had permission to be there and use the piano. We found it odd that he couldn't name who his bishop was or who gave him this permission he spoke of. He did give his ward information, but that ended up being on the other side of Orange County. Finally, from all looks of it...he lived out of his van that was parked outside.
He did give one name whom the Bishop had finally gotten a hold of. She was in fact in charge of the upcoming production, but she didn't know who this guy was or why he was in our building.
So the Bishop asked me to accompany him as we gently asked this man to leave the building. He got quite upset and loud as he gathered his grocery bags. He ranted about how he was only there to make music and that music was all he lived for. I am not sure that tapping out A, E and F repeatedly with about 8 seconds of pause between each note constitutes music...but, to each his own.
However, I don't think I will soon forget his parting words that he loudly spoke over my Bishop's attempts to explain the proper order of scheduling the building, our transient friend shouted, "If you are trying to kick me out...then you obviously don't know what MUSIC is about!"
Apparently, I don't.