Scotland!

The blustery weather of yesterday takes me back to a time that I visited the enchanting country of Scotland. It seems that it was only a week or so ago that I was preambling along the rolling green hills of bonny Scotland, an overcast sky painted in every shade of gray, and a pureness of air cycling through my lungs. It really is a beautiful country with wonderful people.

I went to Scotland for work to attend a school there that is designed to help train people for survival situations off-shore. Aberdeen is an international hub for the European oil industry, and it is located on the north shores of Scotland. There you will find a booming economy central to supporting the drilling of oil in the North Sea. Because of this propensity for the industry, many of the most sought out training facilities are established there. The school that I went to was designed specifically for off-shore survival.

The three days of intense training that I went through were basically broken up into three categories. 1) First Aid, 2) Fire Fighting, 3) H.U.E.T. or Helicopter Underwater Escape Training. I'll write more on the third one in my next post.

With the first aid training, it wasn't your basic, run-of-the-mill CPR certification. By re-creating scenarios that have happened in the past, we would be presented with a situation and asked how to proceed. An example might be:

You have just evacuated a rig. You and 28 other people have successfully deployed an emergency raft designed only for 20 people. You are floating in the North Sea, where the June temperature of the water is 15 Celsius (59 Fahrenheit), and it is November. 3 people are unconscious. 1 person has a compound fracture of the leg. 2 more people are bleeding uncontrollably, and 1 person has gone into shock. Your supplies consist of food and water rations for 20 people for 3 days, you have a VERY limited first aid kit, 1 knife, two oars, 6 flares, and a bailing bucket. You are several hundred miles from any land. What do you do?

We would then proceed to figure out the best possible solutions. Sometimes we were asked why we did certain things first and postponed first aid to others. The whole idea was to help us get our minds wrapped around the idea that, A) 911 wasn't always going to be there for us, and B) sometimes, you had to make tough decisions.

It was very eye opening.

We also had the opportunity to learn basic fire fighting. Again, being out on a rig, you don't always have many of the things that we take for granted around here, such as if the structure you are currently in starts on fire...you can't always run outside and get away. So...what do you do?

We learned about the different types of fires that are possible, and which methods work best to extinguish them. It wasn't all book work and PowerPoints either. They had a very elaborate fire yard to help us with practical application.

We also learned different means of escaping a smoke filled room.

When we weren't in classes, we spent most of our time out and about seeing the sites. Now, Aberdeen is not well-known for its tourism, so catering to that crowd is held at a minimum. However, we were still able to see many wonderful things.
Downtown Aberdeen:

The architecture:

Random Cool Buildings:

But I think one of the best parts was their polite way of telling you what the speed limit was:

How courteous of them!

I've Seen London...I've Seen France...

But they've all seen my underpants.

Can I just tell you that Europe is awesome? First of all, (because I know this is what you are all really wondering), I did pass my Sea Survival Training and am now certified to work under both UK and Norway Regulations in the North Sea. Now for those of you willing to stick it out a little longer, I will tell you about the rest of the story. I am going to break this down into about three posts.

Post Number 1: London!
The first leg of my journey involved an overnight stay in a little town I like to call, London. It's in England. We had 12 hours from the minute that we landed at 8:15 PM Saturday night until 8:15 AM Sunday morning when we continued on to Scotland. Minus the time it took us to get to the hotel, get signed in, and then get back to the airport the next morning, we had about 5 hours. We scheduled 1 hour for sleep from 4:30 to 5:30 AM, giving us 4 hours to explore and enjoy this hub of international crossroads.
Our first stop was the nearest underground station. We met a cheeky woman who was more than excited to share with us how to get into the "bowels of London". We followed her advice, got lost and then figured our way out of it.
Our first goal was Big Ben. We were discussing how we would know where to go once we got outside, but that problem was solved the moment we were walking up the steps from underground and looked up. This is the sight we saw:

Well, that was easy.
We spent the next three hours squeezing more into our tour of London than I think anyone else has ever successfully squeezed before. We were able to see the Parliament Building, St. Abbey's Cathedral, Trafalgar Square, the Thames River, The Eye of London, Piccadilly Square, the Sherlock Holmes Restaurant, the home of Herman Melville (author of "Moby Dick"), rode a double-decker bus, and topped it all off with a street hot dog! We pretty much saw everything there is to see except Buckingham Palace. We dodged a LOT of drunk people, got caught up into two different dance club crowds, and ate at McDonald's. While we were there, an Irish man came up to us and wanted to shake our hands. With each hand shake, he looked us in the eye and said, "Aye...that's a good fine grip you have there lad! Fancy a fight do ya?"
None of us took him up on the offer. But it was fun. The same Irishman then went on to call a couple of other people "wankers", and then he wandered off in a drunken stupor. What a night!
However, the best is yet to come. On weekends in London, to help alleviate the constant bladder pressure that must plague all of their drunk patrons, the good city of London sets out portable plastic urinals on most street corners. Picture this: a tall gray column of plastic, sectioned off into 4 equal parts, thus enabling four mates all to take care of business at the same time. Of course, not wanting to perturb the balance of British Custom, I figured, "When in Rome..."

It was only after I urinated in Trafalgar Square that we found out that London is the most videotaped city in the world. The average working citizen is caught on video about 820 times a day.

I'm a Star!

Not bad for 4 hours.

On to Aberdeen Scotland!

Woe Is Me...

I want to first thank all those of you who made it to movie night last Friday. I hope that everyone had as good a time as I did. For those of you who missed out, we did watch "Run Fat Boy Run". All who showed up were given a Marathon Number to pin on their shirt, and plenty of Gatorade to go around. I want to give a special shout-out to Jamie for her fantastic mini-pumpkin pies! Even Scott thoroughly enjoyed them.
On Saturday I took a date up to drive the Nebo Loop. Due to unforeseen circumstances, we only had enough time to get up to Payson Lakes and back. But it was a lot of fun. We got some really good pictures in the short time we had. (Thanks Kaila for letting me take your camera!) My date had a really red coat that stood out in fantastic contrast to the yellow leaves of the Quakies. I wish I had taken more advantage of that.
So the other day we get a message at work that instead of going to Scotland in December or January, they are going to move it up and send us before the end of the month. They are breaking us up in to 4 groups of 4 and staggering our trips to accommodate the training school in Aberdeen Scotland. Most groups are going to be gone for 5 days: 1 day of travel, 3 days in Aberdeen, and 1 day to return home. One group however, has to leave a day earlier than normal...spend a night in London...arrive on a Sunday morning, (thus giving them PLENTY of time to adjust for jet lag)...three days of schooling...(to learn how to survive in a water helicopter crash). Oh and then they have to stay one more extra day to get European Physicals done. (Apparently European Doctors don't trust American Doctors.) (Please tell me that I don't have to explain the irony of this picture)
Anyway...after the extra day chock full of a 15 minute inconvenience, this same group has to hang out in Scotland all that day and then they FINALLY get to depart on their homeward journey on Friday. Two extra days...more extra time...more extra pay.

Guess which group I am in.

It's ok...if I wasn't me....I would be jealous too.

If anyone is interested, tomorrow night, (Wednesday), I am going to have an impromptu movie night and watch "Braveheart"...and you are welcome to join me! It is rated R. For anyone who has had a stereotypical "What's Your Favorite: (fill in the blank)" First-date Conversation with me, you will know that this is my number one, all-time favorite movie. Of course most of the hundreds of people (girls) that would fall into that category are probably not reading this blog right now, nor ever. But alas...I digress. I'm going to Scotland! I'm going to eat Haggis! I'm going to wear a kilt in the traditional manner! Man...I have a tough life!

My Date With Karlos

I have been set up on a lot of dates...but Saturday night's took the cake! Craig and I were talking the other day on the phone and he asked if I wanted to go to a play that was being put on at The Heritage School where he worked. He said that he was coming, his parents and possibly a couple of other people.
That crazy Craig...he ended up working, and the only others to show up were Karlos and me.
So my "date" and I watched "Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat".
Lousy date....I didn't even get a good night kiss.
All joking aside...this was a fantastic production. All of the participants were between the ages of 12 and 18. Both Karl and I were very impressed with the quality of the play, the props, the acting and the overall production. The Heritage School does a fantastic job. They put on a production like this once a year, and I highly recommend you check it out. I plan to go again next year...but this time with a female date.
Speaking of dates...have you seen this movie? "My Date With Drew". It is a documentary about a guy who really, REALLY wants to go out on a date with Drew Barrymore. I won't tell you how it ends...but I recommend you check it out.
Finally...as long as we are on the topic of movies...I am announcing the first official Blu-Ray Movie Night! Everyone who wants to come is invited. (It helps that I don't have a couch yet...plenty of room for people to sit on the floor).
On Friday October 10th at 7:00 PM...we will be watching "Run Fat Boy Run". If you haven't seen this, I highly recommend it. It is a hilarious, yet touching movie that will move you...well, to do something.
As with all Movie Nights, you are required to dress appropriately. The theme is "Running".
If you don't know where I live in Provo...leave me a comment and I will contact you with the information.

A Real Post

Hi! How are ya?
Ok, so I want to apologize for the last post. Due to the fact that I currently do not have Internet access at my apartment, it has been slightly difficult to get around to posting on my blog. However, I was looking at my sweet Helio 3G Phone that surfs the Net and thought, "Why don't I post on my blog using my phone?" Trust me...the thought was genius. The execution...not so much. Obviously I am not as cool as my cousin Matt. Maybe if I had attempted to post from a funeral instead of sitting on the toilet...
I do want to publicly thank those of you who still commented on my blank post though. Comments on my blog are pretty much the only validation I get in life...so I greatly appreciate it. Thank you!


So in case you haven't heard...I am back in Utah!Yes...that disturbance you felt in The Force...that was me re-entering the Bubble. Can I tell you how happy and excited I am to be here? Seriously...this is one of the greatest places to live. Being this much closer to family makes it all the better.
In fact...today I was able to attend the "farewell" of my cousin Laura's son, David. (Side note: He is going to be one fantastic missionary! Look out Samoa!) Afterwards, we all gathered together at their home to enjoy a wonderful meal and each others' company. Several of us gathered around the shade of one tree and were visiting, and the comment came up that we have "too many cousins". We started joking about voting off some of the cousins so it would be easier to keep track of. We started throwing out names of people to vote off, (mostly people that weren't there to defend themselves), but every single name that was suggested, we started talking about them and telling stories that we remember about them, and inevitably vetoed the votes. Every single person we could name, we had wonderful memories and feelings for. I tell you what...I have the greatest family ever, both immediate and extended.
Speaking of immediate family...I am an uncle again! My sister Gretchen gave birth to a little girl a few days ago. I am very excited to see my new niece.
Now that I am back in Utah...I have started a new job. Can I tell you that this is THE GREATEST JOB EVER? No really. It is. My new job consists of so many varying responsibilities and areas of knowledge that I will never, ever get bored. Not only will I be traveling around the WORLD ensuring that equipment is working properly, but within that scope, I will be dealing with everything from electronic wiring to man-handling rough terrain equipment in all sorts of environments. Last week we had a lecture on wave theory and the differences between electromagnetic and mechanical waves...and in the same day we started first aid and CPR training.
We also found out that when we go to Scotland for our off-shore training, we will also be trained as fire fighters.Can you just see my Man Points skyrocketing upwards?
One of the first things that we were asked to do was to get some steel-toe boots for work, (and the company paid for them). The first day I wore them, I felt like drinking milk straight from the container, driving around and NOT asking for directions, and then spend time NOT listening when girls were speaking to me. I felt like a Real Man.
In case you were wondering, if you had carried on a conversation with me on Friday afternoon/evening, it quite possible could have gone like this:
You: "Hello Zachary!"

Me: "Well Hello (fill in name/relation here)! How are you doing?"

You: "I am doing well! Thank you for asking. So what did you do today?"

Me: "Why it's funny that you ask...today I certified as a Rough Terrain Forklift Operator."

You: "Wow Zachary! You are amazing!"

Me: "I certainly am."

Now if we could have had a similar conversation last night, it could have gone like this:

You: "Hello Zachary!"

Me: "Well Hello (fill in name/relation here)! How are you doing?"

You: "I am doing well! Thank you for asking. So what did you do today?"

Me: "Why it's funny that you ask...today I certified to have my HAM Radio license."

You: "Wow Zachary! You are quite accomplished!"

Me: "I certainly am."

Again...that is just a sample of what could have transpired between us.

So yes...in the last few days, I certified as a rough terrain forklift operator and earned my HAM Radio license (I get my call sign on Monday or Tuesday! Then I can get my license plates! Geeks will inherit the Earth!). Utah has been good to me!

So if you ever find yourself in a quandary involving a rough terrain forklift and/or a HAM Radio...you know who to call.

As a final note...I have to say that I am quite impressed with the lack of interest by most parties in setting me up on blind dates. Thank you...I actually really appreciate that. There are a few offers that have come through, and I have accepted some. If anyone has any good date ideas...I am always looking for something to supplant the "Dinner and Movie" standby. So let your creativity flow!

"The Rocker" ROCKS!

I'll admit...I really didn't put a whole lot of stock into expecting much from this movie. However, as a last "Harrah!" in California, a friend and I went and saw it tonight.

IT WAS AWESOME!

Seriously...we thought it would start strong and then go downhill from there...or that all the funny parts were already shown in the trailers. Oh no...it started strong and like a steroid-pumped Russian body builder...just kept going to the final credits. The music was fantastic. The acting was great. The storyline was good. The humor and dialog were brilliant!

Oh and if that isn't enough to convince you...for those of you who remember a short-lived, but genius series called "Love Monkey" with Tom Cavanagh (also famous for his roles as JD's older brother in Scrubs, and Ed from Ed)...the lead singer of the band in "The Rocker", is played by Teddy Geiger, the same kid who played Wayne.

Wayne was good. "Curtis" (the character) is better. Teddy Geiger is awesome.

If you go to see this movie and you don't like it...I will fight you.

Go see "The Rocker" right now. Stop reading this. Go now. Seriously. You'll thank me. And I will say, "You are welcome. I told you so."

Why are you still here?

Seriously...leave!

Finally.